Heavy in your arms
by HeatherMason
Summary: Takes place a short bit after "Journey's end" the last ep of series 4. Rose is left in the alternate universe with the other Doctor. His feelings for her are the same, but will Rose ever settle for the version of the Doctor that stands before her?
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Hello and welcome to another story I am currently typing! So busy busy busy! Anywho! ALONS-Y!

Chapter 1: The other side

There was sheer silence as Jackie, Rose and the not-Doctor boarded the zeppelin to head home. The Doctor still held her hand but she hadn't addressed him again. Since she had looked at him on the beach as the TARDIS faded away, it had been silent. He watched her eyes dart in every direction but towards him. He knew she had been put through a lot between the fight with the Daleks and now this. She was stuck with a duplicate of the man she loved. They sat in a few small seats that were just on the inside of the zeppelin. The Doctor was mesmerized at the sight. He hadn't been on one the first time he had been here in this dimension, or at least the memories from his original self knew he hadn't. The area of space for what it was worth had ample room. It still was nothing compared to the TARDIS having multiple levels and rooms inside a small blue box. He already was beginning to miss it. The adventures, the traveling, being amongst the stars and other beings of life. He knew eventually he would have a new TARDIS and he could go off and explore again. For now, he was needed here by Rose's side. He examined the interior of the zeppelin as they all got in. There were a few small rooms towards the back of the quarters that housed beds to sleep on along with a decent sized control room and seating area.

Pete greeted them as they entered the main room with seats.

"Welcome home." He said hugging Jackie then looked at Rose and the Doctor. He turned to Jackie and she shook her head obviously telling him not to touch the subject at least for the moment.

"Mum, I'm really tired." Rose said, letting the Doctor's hand go. "I'm going to lay down for a spell." Jackie studied her daughter's face and nodded.

"Alright love, I'll get you up when we land." Rose smirked a small smile to relieve some of the concern on Jackie's face. She nodded her head, not looking at the Doctor once and walked into one of the small rooms with a bed and closed the door behind her.

"Fat lot of help that man did!" Jackie said after Rose had left the room.

"If she goes down the same road she did the last time she was on that beach.." She shook her head then looked at the Doctor. "I hope he's happy!"

"Quite the opposite by now." He said walking towards one of the windows to look out towards the sky. "He probably is all alone again by now. He only has himself to blame for that. I know he had his reasons for bringing us here but it still doesn't sit right, even with me."

"Wait a minute, what do you mean by alone? What about Donna?" She asked. His face became rather grim as he turned to face her.

"She had the power of a time lord in her. A human isn't able to handle that amount of power. It would kill her by burning her up. His only choice at this point is to wipe her mind completely, making her forget anything and everything about the Doctor." He lowered his head, feeling bad for the person that was responsible for creating him.

"That's Awful!" Said Jackie. Pete came over and rubbed her shoulders. It was obvious that he was beginning to act a lot like the Pete that truly was Rose's father. He watched them for a moment then looked away, feeling a bit uneasy.

On the beach, Rose had pulled him to her and kissed him. It had felt magnificent, all and more of what he always thought it would be like to truly kiss Rose Tyler. But, he knew how his other self had felt seeing that. He knew that Rose would be happy eventually, being with the form of him that would always remain his tenth regeneration and never change. At first he was mad at him for leaving them both here, but now he understood why it had to be done.

"But now I really don't understand things." Jackie said. "Why didn't he take you lot with him?"

"Were you really ready to give your daughter away? To never see her again?" He asked studying Jackie's face.

"Well, no."

"Good, because you know he couldn't' stay here. He had to go back to protect the other reality where you're old family and friends are. Where Mickey is now. Would you rather had the Doctor stay and doom that reality?"

"Of course not! Don't put words in my mouth!"

"Well it was either one or the other and to him his life cannot simply revolve around the Tyler family." She could see the storm brewing in his eyes as he looked at her. It reminded her of how rude he was in the beginning when she had first met him when he didn't look like the man that stood in front of her now.

"It's just that I'd rather have her happy then like this again. You have no idea how bad it was for her." She said.

"Probably just as bad as it was for me." He said.

"You weren't even around then."She scoffed.

"You keep forgetting Jackie, I still have the same memories, I remember everything he's felt for over nine hundred years in this body. I'm practically the same person. Unlike him, I can't hide this side of me because of my.. humanness." He said gulping.

"Don't make it sound like being part human is a bad thing!"Jackie said.

"Oi! I'm not used to having one heart! It's rather disgusting!" He said, sounding a bit like Donna. He instantly clapped a hand over his mouth and looked at her.

"Sorry, that was a bit of Donna getting out." He fidgeted for a moment.

"As I was saying, he left us here for a reason. He's tired of losing people and he knew here that Rose would stay safe."

"But what if something happens here in the future? Then what? He won't be able to come here to help." Jackie said, trying not to raise her voice to disturb Rose in the other room.

"That's why he left me here. Part human or not, he's left me the duty of being a defender of the Earth along with the others here."

"Are you implying you plan to become an alliance to Torchwood?" Pete asked.

"Precisely." He answered. "Someone has to make sure you lot aren't messing it up." He said. Pete looked at him and crossed his arms while looking towards Jackie.

"Are you sure this isn't the real Doctor? He seems just as cheeky as before to me."

"Cheeky? You call me being cheeky when yet last time I was here you had cybermen all over the place?" The Doctor said crossing his arms in front of them.

"I didn't forget about that." Pete spat, holding Jackie's hand firmly as he thought of the other Jackie that had been destroyed and changed into a cyberman.

"Well neither did I." The Doctor grit his teeth as he spoke, putting force behind his words.

"Come on now, keep your tones down." Jackie hissed. The Doctor looked back towards the small door that Rose had gone into.

"Sorry, but anyhow, Same me, new body. Well, partially new body, same as before really, even the mole. I've really gotten attached to that mole."

"And a bit of an attitude." Jackie said. "I still can't stand that he, you, well you know what I bloody well mean, is putting her through this again." She commented, not entirely looking at the Doctor now.

"H- how was she?... After last time?" He didn't know how bad it had been but he feared to know honestly, still his worry for Rose was beginning to show. Jackie took a deep breath and spoke.

"She worked for Torchwood when it opened back up for business, trying to do better for the company like she said you would've wanted. But after we went to bloody Norway and she saw you, she was a complete mess. She did some work for Torchwood but it was at home on her computer. It took her weeks really to get up and do anything. Most she ever did was go to the pub with Mickey some nights. She wasn't eating too much so it was easy for her to get pretty pissed at the pubs off of a few beers. Mickey would have to carry her back to her flat some nights or just set her on the couch at our place." Jackie said looking over at the Doctor. His eyes weren't looking at either her nor Pete, he was hanging his head in shame. Jackie walked over to the Doctor and looked at him in his face. He was sullen, knowing that Mickey was most likely the only person that was really there for her when he had gone the last time. Now Mickey was in the opposite world, the same world as the Doctor she wanted. She had noone but a person that would remind her of the one she loved.

"Let me tell you something about those who get left behind, because it's hard. I'm warning you, if you are planning to stick by Rose's side, never let her down." He nodded his head, not looking at Jackie's face and looked towards the floor. The uneasiness in the room was almost palpable. Pete then cleared his throat before he talked.

"Well Doctor you might as well make yourself comfortable. We won't be landing for a few hours." Pete said getting comfy in one of the chairs in the main room. Jackie sat next to him and rested her head on Pete's shoulder.

"Is Tony with the nanny?" Jackie asked. Pete just smiled and nodded his head as Jackie gave out a small sigh and closed her eyes.

"I'm going to look about the cabin for a while." He said shoving his hands into his blue suit pants pockets and walking away.

He walked down the hall past Rose's door and paused at it for a moment. He couldn't help but feel the temptation of going in and trying to talk to her. He knew there was every possibility that she was asleep, but he knew there was a possibility that she was also awake and still upset. He peered into one of the rooms across from Rose's door and found another small bed in a room. The window was just to the side of the bed, showing nothing but blue sky and white clouds. He shut the door and walked a bit farther down the hall near the back of the cabin area and found a small bathroom on board along with a small room that held a shelf of books to be read. They looked like they were there strictly for just to complete the look of the room but The Doctor knew better than to waste books. He simply picked one up from the shelf and looked at the title. It was obvious then that they were the small romance novels that you could find anywhere just for something quick for a lady to read. He simply flipped through the book and read the pages inhumanly quick. He then set the book back on the shelf. He then picked up another and looked at it being about the same. The picture of the girl on the cover in the throws of passion in the arms of a muscled tan man with dark hair and a chisled face. He flipped through a few chapters. As he was putting the book back, he heard a faint sound against the wall that he was standing next to. He then realized the room was shaped like an L, meaning he was hearing something going on in Rose's room. He set the book down and walked out of the room. He checked down the hall and noticed Pete and Jackie not moving, meaning they wouldn't hear him make any movement or sound at least for the time being. He turned the small metal handle slowly and then pushed the door a small crack so he could look inside. He noticed Rose tossing and turning giving out small heaving sounds. She was crying in her sleep. He wanted to go to her, and at least make her feel better, but he knew that she wouldn't exactly want him there.

He played memories back in his mind of her grabbing his hand and pulling him into the room he had given her in the TARDIS. It was never anything he had to worry about, she was just the cuddling type. The kind that just talked about her life and listened to stories until she fell asleep. He never wanted to admit it, but he did miss waking up to Rose Tyler with bed head. She was meant to always be in the TARDIS with him. She was never meant to live a normal life. He slowly shut the door and went back into the other room looking around. He picked up another small book he found in the small nook in the corner and read the title, his eyes widened. The true tale of red riding hood and the big bad wolf. The word big had not been changed, however, bad wolf was two times larger than any of the other words, it was also written in a different calligraphy then the rest of the title.

Bad wolf, those words followed them everywhere linking them together through out space and time. He knew it hadn't been a coincidence. She had always been meant for him in some sort. If this was how destiny was meant to of played out for them, then it meant she was meant to always be with him for the rest of her life. He smirked a smile at that thought for a moment but it faded quickly as he thought of Rose on her bed still heaving small breaths with her sobs. He put the book back onto the shelf and ran his hands through his hair. He sat on the floor, against the wall that he knew was next to Rose's. It was the closest he could be to her for the moment without disturbing her. At that point, he thought they might as well be worlds apart.

He put his hand into his pocket and pulled out the small coral of the TARDIS. If he did what Donna had said, he would have his own TARDIS in about a years time. He had to smirk a smile for a moment. Donna had been bloody brilliant. The Doctor with Rose Tyler in the TARDIS, just as it should be.

It was her choice now if she really wanted that, if she really wanted him. He knew he couldn't be a replacement for her Doctor anytime soon. His mind began to wonder if he ever could. He closed his eyes and took deep breaths, a small yawn escaped him. Since when could he get tired? _Oh, right, human._. He shuddered. _This is going to take some getting used to._ He kept his eyes shut and thought of past memories with Rose, never fully moving away from the kiss that they had shared on the beach until his mind faded away as he fell asleep.

_I know you think it's outrageous, to come on all courageous and offer you my hand. Pull you up onto dry land, when all I got is sinking sand. - David gray "The other side"_


	2. Atmospheric disturbance meteor shower

Chapter 2: Atmospheric disturbance (Meteor shower)

_Rose was standing in front of him, peering out of the window that showed the glowing light of red and dusty rocks that swirled past the observation deck. _

"_The end of the Earth. Its gone, we were too busy saving our selves. All those years, all that history and no one was even looking.. It's just.." The doctor took her hand and held it firmly in his. _

"_Come with me." He said, with her walking with him into the TARDIS. He let her hand go to work on the controls. She looked around the main deck as he worked and heard the grinding sound that always hummed whenever the TARDIS was beginning it's departure and arrival. Suddenly it stopped and The Doctor looked at Rose. She looked at him curiously._

"_Where are we?" She asked. _

"_Look outside." He said nodding his head towards the door. He saw her walk out and noticed the daylight shine inside the TARDIS before she had shut the door behind her. He quickly followed and found her standing there observing everyone and everything around her. She was seeing it with new eyes._

"_You think it'll last forever, people and cars and concrete. But it won't one day it's all gone, even the sky." He looked up at the blue sky and thought of the red sky that had belonged to his home planet."My planet's gone." He continued. "It's dead. It burned like the earth. It's just rocks and dust , before it's time." He felt the dull ache of loneliness return inside him. _

"_What happened?" She asked. _

"_There was a war and we lost." _

"_A war with who?" She asked. He didn't answer, not wanting to scare her away with the tales of the Daleks. "What about your people?" She asked. _

"_I'm a time lord. I'm the last of the time lords. They're all gone I'm the only survivor I'm left traveling on my own 'cause there's no one else." He said looking around, not meeting her eyes. He could feel her eyes looking at him with sorrow._

"_There's me." She noted. He wanted to smile but he turned to her to address her seriously._

"_You've seen how dangerous it is. Do you want to go home?" He asked _

"_I don't know. I want..." She then sniffed the air and looked around. "Can you smell chips?" The change of subject was a relief to The Doctor. _

"_Yeah." He answered smiling at her. _

"_I want chips." She said, drawing out her words to make it however more clear her urging for chips.._

"_Me too." He said watching her._

"_Right then, before you get me back in that box, chips it is, you can pay" She said quickly._

"_No money." He said. She looked at him incredulously. Someone that could travel in time and didn't have a pence on him. She smiled at him _

"_What sorta date are you? Come on tight wad, chips are on me. We only have five billion years before the shops close." She said jokingly putting her tongue out between her teeth in a smile. They fluidly walked together in sync, hand in hand. She then turned to him before they arrived at the chip shop on the nearby corner. _

"_Doctor?" She said. He waited for her to say something, but she kept just repeating his name. _

"_Doctor? Doctor..._Doctor?" He suddenly felt himself being shaken and slowly opened his eyes. He looked quickly to the side of him and realized he was inside the zeppelin, he had been dreaming. He put his hand behind his head and rubbed his neck.

"Ah." He exclaimed, trying to move his neck to either side. His neck felt stiff and sore against the paneling of the wall he had leaned against. He then looked at the form in front of him almost giving a sigh of relief seeing it being Rose. She seemed a bit at ease now.

"Crick in your neck I'm guessing? That's what you get for sleeping in a corner on the floor." She put her hand out to take his and help him up from the ground. He lifted himself up, trying not to pull her down with him and brushed his backside off.

"We landed?" He asked. Looking out one of the windows and seeing trees and buildings in the distance.

"Yeah a few minutes ago. Mum wanted to wake ya but I figured you wouldn't want a good floggin' on your first day here." She said smirking a smile.

"Well I appreciate the rescue Rose Tyler." He said, keeping her hand in his. "Alons-y!"

They walked out of the zeppelin and onto the helipad where Jackie and Pete were standing waiting for them.

"Finally got him up eh? I was worried I was going to have to make some tea to get him up again." She said giving out a small laugh. The Doctor smirked a smile at her and then towards Rose who in turn still carried a small smile on her face. Not a big smile that he was used to seeing, but a smile none the less. They all crowded into the car that was waiting for them and they were on their way back to the mansion.

When they reached the mansion, Jackie made it in first. An excited little child came running out from one of the rooms near the front door.

"Mummy mummy!" The little boy said running towards Jackie. Jackie scooped him up and gave him a big hug.

"There's my little Tony!" He giggled as she put kisses all over his face. "Have you been good while I was gone?" Jackie asked him. Tony nodded his head and looked towards the room where he had came out of. A woman entered the room then. She had dark brown curls all around her head and wore a black and white dress a bit on the hefty side but her energy made up for it keeping up with the little boy.

"I assure you he was behaving." The woman said.

"Thank you Katherine." Said Jackie. "I know it was such short notice to take care of him."

"Oh nonsense, it was no problem at all." She said waving it off. She looked towards the man in the blue suit and smiled for a moment.

"Don't tell me..." Katherine said looking him up and down and then turning to Rose.

"Hello! I'm the Doctor." Said The Doctor.

"You finally found him Rose! How wonderful!" Katherine said, practically beaming.

"Yeah, only took the threat of the end of existence but yeah.." She looked towards him and gave him a small smile. "I found him." Katherine hugged Rose for a moment and looked towards them all.

"You must all be hungry from your trip! I'll go and make tea."She said about to walk away.

"Just some proper tea will be all Katherine." Said Jackie. Katherine stopped and turned around.

"Are you all not hungry mam?" She asked and looked at their faces.

"I think we are all more tired than anything. I think it's some camomile tea for my nerves and then bedtime."

"Yes mam." She then looked at the rest of them. "Any other requests?" Katherine asked.

"Just regular tea for me." Said Rose.

"I second that." Said the Doctor looking and Rose and smirking a smile.

"Coffee for me, thank you Katherine." Said Pete.

"It'll be ready in a few moments." She said walking down a hallway into what appeared to be a large kitchen.

"I almost forgot how big this place was." The Doctor said looking around and looking up at the chandelier that hung from the ceiling another floor up. It produced elegant lighting for the small space.

"Mum, I think after tea, I'm going to just head to my flat." She said.

"Don't be silly Rose! There's plenty of room here for you two, you know that!" She said extending her arms out to signify the size of the mansion. Rose looked at her uneasily then looked at the Doctor. "Besides, you don't have any clothes for the Doctor to wear tonight. I know we have to have something here that would fit him. I bet Mickey has some jim jams. In fact I'm sure of it. I always give him a set of jim jams for Christmas and I've never seen him wear the bloody things." Said Jackie.

"Alright mum, we'll stay. At least for tonight." Rose said. Pete then cleared his throat, not trying to be rude.

"Well now that that's sorted, Rose I-"

"Don't worry dad, I'll have a full report on your desk first thing when I can get to my laptop." She said. It caught him by surprise.

"Well that's a relief but I was about to say maybe you wanted some proper time off? It would do you some good and you could show the Doctor around. He can get properly adjusted that way." Rose looked at the Doctor who was beaming away at that thought.

"How long are we talking about 'proper time off'?" She asked him quizzically, she wasn't enjoying the idea of being away from work for an extended amount of time. The Doctor then realized it wasn't exactly an option for her, he studied her reaction as she was still gripping onto his hand.

"A month, maybe? Rose after everything that went on.."

"You weren't there. I'm fine! I can take a week, but a month? Do you know how behind I'll be?" She said obviously trying to find excuses.

"Rose, sweetheart, you haven't taken really any time off since we got here. You need some time to get the Doctor situated here and you need to relax." Jackie said looking at her.

"You won't be behind on your work either Rose, you know you're ahead of everyone there. It'll take a month or two for everyone to catch up as it is. If you're so worried then I can have Ianto send you a report every morning on what everyone is up to and if something major goes on you will be the first to know." She looked at her mum and dad for a moment and then looked at the Doctor and studied his face. He looked concerned to say the least. She gave out a small sigh and rolled her eyes, something the Doctor was used to seeing when she had first boarded the TARDIS with him when he was in his 9th regeneration form.

"Fine." She said. "But I want a report from Ianto in the mornings."

"Of course." Said Pete. Katherine then entered the main lobby again, they all still stood there in the doorway.

"Well are you all ever going to move out of the lobby? Your tea and coffee is ready." Said Katherine. Everyone then proceeded into the kitchen where they all grabbed a mug of tea.

"Oh, this is just what I needed." Said Jackie lightly sipping her tea. They all sat there in silence in the room for a while. Rose finished her tea first and put the mug into the sink, washed it out and dried it with a tea towel. She then put it back in the cupboard.

"You didn't have to do that mam, I could've taken care of that." Said Katherine.

"It was only a mug Kat, no worries." She said putting it back into the cupboard. The Doctor walked up the Rose at the sink and handed her his mug. She did the same to his as she did her own and put it away. She then dried off her hands and took the Doctors hand.

"Come on you, let's find ya some jim jams." Pete and Jackie watched them both as they walked out of the kitchen hand in hand and then went up the flight of stairs.

They walked down the hall and opened a door. Rose walked in as the Doctor stood at the doorway, slightly fidgeting.

"I know those jim jams are in here." She said, opening a lower dark oak chester drawer, then proceeding to the next one down. The Doctor scanned the room, looking at the bed that was neatly made along with the pictures that hung on the wall and the pictures that were in small frames around the tables. Some of them having Rose and Jackie in them and some having Mickey with his gran.

"Rose.." The Doctor said. She still was going through the drawers, moving all the material in each drawer this way and that to look deeper into it.

"Rose?" He repeated. She then turned to him and her breathing hitched for a second, taking all of him in with her eyes for a moment. He looked down towards his stomach and she could hear his stomach grumble from where she was in Mickey's room.

"Sounds like your hungry mate." She said giving out a small giggle. "Ah here they are!" She exclaimed pulling out a pair of dark blue sweatpants and a matching tee shirt. She closed the drawer and brought them over to him. She placed them shirt against his front.

"Looks like the shirt will fit ya. I know the pants will, they are adjustable anyways." She said, handing the clothes to him. He took them from her as she whirled him around and pushed him lightly out of the door, shutting it behind herself as they both exited the room.

"You're room is here." She said, opening the door showing a nice guest room with a small telly and a comfortable full size bed. The sheets were a nice white tone that popped from the red walls and plush red carpeting. He placed the jim jams on the edge of the bed and walked with Rose back out into the hallway.

"I'm right across the hall from you. So if you need anything..." She trailed looking at him. He nodded towards her then heard his stomach again.

She smiled and took his hand again.

"Come on you, lets get you something to eat. I know just the place." She said smiling and pulling him with her. He followed her to the kitchen where Jackie was reading a fashion magazine as Pete was reading the newspaper.

"We're going to the shop. We'll be back." She said.

"Alright." Jackie said barely looking up from her magazine. "I think it's about time to put Tony to bed." Jackie said. Rose walked over to her little brother and hugged him.

"You'll probably be in bed before I get back then, yeah? Goodnight Tony." Rose said kissing her brother on the forehead.

"Night night." Said Tony as Jackie took Tony's hand and they walked out of the kitchen. Rose and the Doctor then opened the door and looked out into the night sky.

"You might want to get an umbrella!" Said The Doctor as he opened the door.

"It sure is coming down now." She said looking at the rain falling quickly.

"Atmospheric disturbance." He said, looking glum for a moment. "Still it'll pass." She handed him an umbrella as she walked out of the front door and opened the umbrella she had in her hand. The Doctor opened his umbrella up and closed the door behind him, walking with Rose down the street.

"So where are we going?" He asked curiously.

"Chip shop, just down the street here." She said.

"I could go for some chips." He said smirking a smile, thinking back to his dream. "Sadly, I think this time you're going to have to pay this time too. I haven't any money."

"You really are a bad date." She teased. "Maybe I should've listened to mum when she warned me about you." She gave him a small smile as they walked along the road.

"It's not my fault, you know. I don't know what's worse really..." He trailed while he was in thought.

"What do you mean?" She asked.

"Well, I'm here without any clothes besides the ones on me now, no TARDIS, no sonic screwdriver, hell he could've at least traveled back and gotten me five quid to pay for chips." She stopped walking and looked at him. He noticed her movement stop and he turned around to face her.

"I-I'm sorry. I've been so selfish, having other things on my mind and here you are." She said gesturing her hand at him.

"Yes, here I am." He said, walking up to Rose and taking her hand. It felt so pleasant, to hold her hand.

"And you know what?" He asked. She looked at him as he looked around the neighborhood for a moment.

"What?" She asked, watching him. He then turned and gave her a smile.

"I wouldn't have it any other way."

_I can finally see, that you're right there beside me. I am not my own, I have been made new. Please don't let me go. I desperately need you – Owl city "Meteor shower"_


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3:

"So..." The Doctor said, trying to make conversation. Rose had a chip halfway into her mouth as he spoke. "The chips don't taste any different here." He said matter of factly. Rose gave him a small smile.

"Nothing really tastes different. Well except the pears.." She trailed. The Doctor looked at her with a look of fear in his eyes. He really did detest pears.

"I'm kidding." She said, putting her hand on his that was on the table. He smiled at her. It was obvious she was trying to make some sort of good out of today. That's what always made Rose Tyler all the more brilliant.

"So I was thinking earlier about some things." Rose said.

"Like what?" He asked while putting another chip into his mouth and eating it.

"What we should do tomorrow. You still don't have many clothes and I doubt you want to wear Mickey's stuff." She said giggling picturing the Doctor in Mickey's jeans and tee shirts.

"Quite right about that." The Doctor noted.

"We should go to the shops tomorrow and get you some proper clothing."

"That sounds like a good idea. I doubt I want to be a few days in the same suit. Even now, I don't like this." He said raising his arm and sniffing his armpit. His face twisted in a painful look and looked at Rose who giggled at him.

"Don't worry, I'll have your suit washed tonight and you can take a shower."

"With Mickey's soap I'm guessing?" He asked a bit annoyed with that thought.

"Unless you want to smell like coconut." She said

"Better than pears." He commented.

"Actually it's coconut banana." She said. He looked at her and smiled.

"That sounds even better." He said.

"You and your bananas." She said shaking her head and looking at the counter.

"What? Bananas are Brilliant! They're a good source of potassium!" He said.

"And are always good to bring to a party." She added.

"Ha!" He said out loud.

"So what type of clothing should we go looking for tomorrow? The usual?"She asked.

"Oh I dunno. Maybe we can look for some jim jams too. Proper jim jams that I can call mine. Not a rejected Christmas present from your mum to Mickey."

"How about shoes?" She asked.

"Well I could go for another pair of trainers. He's probably mad thinking I took his favorite pair." He said crossing his arms. He barely had to study Rose's face to know she was thinking of him, the proper Doctor again. There was a moment of silence then Rose patted the Doctor's hands and tried to give him a reassuring smile.

"Let's get home. A shower, jim jams and sleep sounds great right about now." She said. He smiled and got up with her. They threw away their trash and then went outside. They pulled their umbrellas out and walked back up the street towards the mansion.

"About earlier Rose.." He trailed.

"Yea?" She said, waiting for him to continue.

"Why were you so quiet? I mean, after everything. You talked to me only after the zeppelin landed."

"I was just deep in thought was all." she answered.

"About?" he asked.

"Just everything that has happened lately. It's just a lot to take in." She felt the warmth of his hand then on hers.

"I know Rose. I hope this time at least, you won't feel so alone.." He trailed, remembering what Jackie had told him about her hard time coping the last time she and the Doctor were separated.

"Nah, not this time." she stated. "It was hard being around Mickey because he knew how I felt about.. well.. you." She said watching him smirk a smile. "He put up with it though, to be there for me. He really was a good shoulder to lean on when I needed him." She said looking out towards the stars.

"Do you think Mickey will be okay?" She asked suddenly.

"I'm sure Mickey will do just fine." He said reassuringly.

"What about the Doctor?" She asked him. His body stiffened at the thought of him now. He was probably all alone now in the TARDIS, wondering what to even do with himself.

"I'm sure he's fine." The Doctor said, trying not to stumble over his own words.

"Yeah, at least he has Donna." She said. "As long as he's not alone anymore, that's what matters."

"Mmm." Said the Doctor. He looked at her give him a small smirk as they walked to the mansion. He hated how he felt. So guilty inside now. Had he just lied to her? It didn't seem fair. But she looked so calm now, thinking that the doctor was at least with someone. She had already been through enough for one day. He didn't want to see her sad again, not today, not ever. At least for this small amount of time she needs to be happy. He thought. The rest of the bad news can wait until later. For the time being he just basked in the moment of holding Rose's hand as they walked towards the mansion.

When they got in, they shook their umbrellas out.

"I'll take those." Said Katherine.

"Thank you." Rose said, handing the umbrellas over to her. She then exited the room and disappeared down the hallway.

"Ah, you're back." Pete said, walking out of another room and walking towards them. "Good. I wanted to talk to the Doctor, if that's alright with you Rose." He watched her, waiting for her approval.

"That's fine. I'll just go take my shower." She said, giving the Doctor a small smile then running upstairs.

"I believe we'll have this conversation in my office, if you don't mind." Pete said.

"Of course." Said the Doctor.

They walked into a hallway then into another hallway that faced the side of the mansion. Pete then pulled a key out of his pocket and unlocked the door and held it open after he entered for the Doctor to enter. He then closed it tight behind him. The Doctor looked around the room, studying all the expensive looking decor in that one room. There were expensive paintings decorating every wall in some sort of fashion. The wall near his desk hung a painting of Jackie from before.

It was hard to really tell the difference really, at least from the painting. They looked exactly the same, only their personalities were completely different. The Doctor would have no problem choosing Rose's Jackie out if he had merely asked about her day. The past Jackie had been obviously living off of schedules and other varieties of media, not caring about anything or anyone but herself. Rose's Jackie however, was selfless for the most part, doing half witted things to make sure her daughter and even Mickey was taken care of. He remembered how Jackie had even taken care of him when he had first regenerated, he had never thanked her really, which made him regardless of how silly she could be, care about her all the more. She never asked for a thanks really, she just did whatever had to be done to keep her daughter happy.

The Doctor set himself down in a comfy plush leather chair near the neatly organized office desk. Pete sat on the corner of his office desk, still obviously trying to figure out exactly what to say.

"Would you like something to drink?" Pete asked.

"Oh, no thank you." Said the Doctor. "Now, what was it you wanted to discuss in your private office? I'm guessing it has something to do with torchwood." Said the Doctor. He wanted to cut to the chase, he always felt uneasy around Pete, at least the Pete that wasn't Rose's father.

"Quite right." Pete said. "I wanted to know what your intentions were to be working with torchwood." Pete said, crossing his leg over.

"Well, unfortunately, as you can see I don't have any materials. But I do have this." He said pulling the coral out of his pocket.

"What is that?" Pete asked.

"A coral, literally a baby TARDIS." the Doctor answered.

"Your phone box?" Pete asked, sounding amused.

"Well Time And Relative Dimension in space, just with a broken chameleon circuit." He added. "I could've fixed it ages ago, but I liked the blue box."

"How would you exactly go about growing that?" Pete asked, crossing his arms.

"That's where you come in." The Doctor said. "I need a while to get her ready. If I do everything right it should only take about a year to get it up and running. But I need space, a good amount of space. Space that no one else can gain access to but me and preferably Rose." He said.

"Well you may have to talk to Rose about that. She already has her own wing in Torchwood It's where she kept tinkering with her dimensional cannon." Pete said.

"Ah." The Doctor said.

"It makes it easier for her to work on her own devices that way. No one bothers her when she's in that wing. Everyone knows it's off limits but to her." Pete said.

"What about you?" the Doctor asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Well, I am director of the building. But even I don't dare bother her when she's in there. I deal with Jackie enough. I don't dare stand in Rose's way." Pete said, giving out a small chuckle.

"I'll talk to Rose then." The Doctor said.

"Is that all you need from us?" Pete asked him curiously.

"Well, now that you mention it, I may need some supplies. I plan to replace my sonic screwdriver at some point." The Doctor said. Pete looked at him and raised his eyebrows.

"You're what?" He asked.

"My sonic screwdriver. You've seen it before. My stick with the blue light."

"Ah, yes." Pete said. "Are you sure you'll be able to find all the parts to assemble one?" He asked.

"Of course! I am brilliant you know." The Doctor said smiling.

"You sure you're not the real Doctor?" The doctor gave Pete a condescending look after he had asked that question for the second time in the same day.

"I'm quite sure, only one heart here." He said.

"So when your ship is ready to travel.." Pete trailed. The Doctor watched him cautiously.

"Yes?"

"You're planning to take Rose with you once it's grown." Pete stated.

"And why not? Rose is the only companion I want on my ship when it's fully functional." The Doctor said.

"Well, I'm leaving you in charge of breaking that news to Jackie." Pete said patting his shoulder. "I'm staying out of the crossfire of that one, at least the most that I can." He added walking to the door. The Doctor followed him out of the office.

"Well, when Rose comes back to Torchwood, you should be ready to accompany her. She can probably fill you in with what's all gone on since you've been away." Pete said.

"Quite right." The Doctor said. "About Rose actually, why did you give her time off?" The Doctor asked him curiously.

"You must understand Doctor, even though she isn't exactly my daughter, it was painful seeing her go through such a hard time because of Jackie being so worried about her. With you around, I pray it will be easier for her but it still isn't going to be easy. You both need time to get reacquainted with each other, and what all has happened between you since then. You both need time to sort things out. This is you're first time truly taking everything in here, so it's best you have her around to fill you in and be there if anything comes up." Pete said.

"Well I do appreciate it, although I'm not so sure about Rose." The Doctor said. Pete gave out a small chuckle.

"No, she completely loathes time away from the office. But I don't understand it really now. She spent all that time in her wing, working to get that cannon to work. You're here now, so there isn't that much of a rush to get back to the office, is there?" He asked. It made the Doctor feel uneasy. It had only been the first day and she wanted to go back to the office already, making him feel less wanted now.

"Don't worry Doctor, I'm sure that with a few days off she'll like it and you two will be fine. Just give it time." Pete said reassuringly. The Doctor looked at him for a moment, it was strange hearing this from someone like Pete. It was obvious that the time that he had been away that this Pete had changed a lot. He was more compassionate towards others. He knew that was only because of Jackie and Rose being there in his life now. The Tylers were like that, always making people better themselves. As they walked out of the hallway into the main lobby, the Doctor could hear the shower running upstairs. He went to the living room and sat for a few moments and grabbed a few magazines off of the table.

"Might as well get updated on current events." He said out loud, flipping through the magazines one at a time.

Rose was in the shower, trying to get the warm water to relax her. She had already bathed completely. It was the matter of just calming herself down. It wasn't helping all that much knowing that the Doctor was just one floor down from where she was. It was still strange to call him the Doctor when he was but wasn't him. It made things all the more confusing. Rose tried to block out all the thoughts she had running through her head, but it seemed impossible now that she had started thinking about the Doctor again. She closed her eyes as she stepped under the cascading water and let it go down her face and her body. She breathed in and out of her mouth and tried to just concentrate on just the breaths. She concentrated on the darkness that was behind her eyelids as she kept her eyes closed. She concentrated on her own heartbeat, trying to calm herself. She could already feel some part of her beginning to betray her.

_Heartbeat... Heartbeat.. Behind her eyelids was the view of Bad Wolf Bay and him, the other Doctor. She turned to him._

"_I look like him. I think like him. Same memories, same thoughts, same everything. Except I've only got one heart... I'm part human. Specifically the aging part. I'll grow old and never regenerate. I've only got one life, Rose Tyler. I can spend it with you, if you want." _

She backed out of the spray and turned the nozzles off , bloody good that did. Her skin was getting all pruny and she still hadn't felt any better since before she had even gotten into the shower. She sighed as she got out and dried off. She put on her nightgown and terry cloth robe along with running a towel through her hair to catch some of the dampness. She then searched in the small drawer next to the sink and pulled out the hair dryer. She plugged it in and turned it on while running a brush through it, untangling some of the knots in her hair that the conditioner hadn't gotten rid of completely. She then put the dryer back into the drawer and brushed her hair out a bit more. She took a strand and smelled it. Her hair smelled clean and fruity, not anymore like that wretched beach.

She hated that place now. It was the place of her misery, sorrow, and loss. It had become a part of her destiny, always intertwining with the Doctor's. It was something she couldn't deny nor escape, and she wasn't sure if she really wanted to do either of those things. Bad Wolf had always tied them together. Even when she had thought it was impossible to get back to him thousands of years into the future, she had found a way, following Bad Wolf. When she found a way to get back to the Doctor that time, the TARDIS had seen into her along with her seeing into the TARDIS. The TARDIS alone now was the only thing that could ever understand her love for the Doctor. The Doctor could not have loved her as much as she did him, otherwise he would have taken her with. He wouldn't have left her behind with a copy of himself to 'make better'.

She wanted to get ready to sleep, but she knew even before she tried to calm herself in the shower, she would have a restless night. She thought about how her mum always drank chamomile tea, which normally did the trick for her. She wrapped the opening of the robe around her, closing off any view of her nightgown underneath and tied it with the cloth belt that was around her robe. She didn't bother putting her slippers on and just padded down the hallway and down the stairs. As she was about to pass the living room, she paused when she saw the recognizable blue suit. He was sitting in a chair, looking at a magazine. His one leg was over the other dangling there and bare. He had taken his shoes off, when she didn't really know. She walked up to him, and he lowered the magazine as his vision directed to her.

"Catching up on current events?" She asked.

"Oh yes." He said, peering back at the current page he was on.

"Find anything important?" She asked casually, sitting on the arm of the chair the Doctor was sitting in.

"I believe so." He said setting the magazine down. "But, it's not in any of these magazines." He said looking up at her and instantly giving her a charming smile. A smile came to her face as she ran one of her hands through his hair. Everything was so confusing. She seemed so against this just minutes ago as she was taking her shower. Now, she couldn't help but feel a smile etch across her face as she ran her fingers through his messy hair and seeing him smile at her.

"Well enough of that, time to get clean." He said as he walked past her and out of the room. Suddenly, she was alone in the living room. It was when she felt her mood start to shift again.

"Rose?" A voice called. She looked up and the Doctor was peering around the door frame.

"Do you mind helping me with the shower? Not sure on how to make the temperature just right in a regular shower. Taking one on the TARDIS does tend to spoil you." He said giving her a wide smile obviously trying to hide his plea for help.

"Alright." She said walking out of the room and following him up the stairs to the bathroom. She turned the nozzles to and fro and checked the temperature a few times while the Doctor went into the guest bedroom and scooped up the jim jams that Rose had found for him. He then set them on top of the bathroom sink.

"Is that alright?" She asked. He shrugged his jacket off of his shoulders and let it drop to the bathroom floor. He then knelt next to her on the side of the tub, and ran his hand through the water.

"Seems fine to me, thank you Rose. You saved me from a proper freezing or scalding." He said, she gave out a small chuckle. She then noticed him pulling his shirt over his head and she felt squeamish being in the same room then.

"Well, I'll let you take your shower. You just have to pull that small stopper on the tap and the shower will start, push it down to cut off the shower." She said. He smiled at her for a moment before turning around again.

"Well, I think I'm gonna go downstairs and grab some tea. I'll take your jacket and shirt to wash." She said picking them both up and hanging them over one of her arms.

"Oh!" she exclaimed before she left the room. He turned his head around to face her for a moment.

"The soap is to your right and here's the shampoo." She said handing him a small bottle of a men's brand of shampoo. "Oh, and the towels are in here." She pointed to the small linen closet door that was across from the bathtub in the corner.

"Ah, brilliant. I think I'll do just fine in here, unless you plan to wash my back for me." He said smirking a smile her way. She felt her cheeks begin to flush. Was he flirting?

"Uh, I think you can wash your back just fine without me. I'll just take these downstairs to wash." She said, then quickly exited the room and scurried downstairs.

She gave out a heavy breath as she got to the bottom of the stairs, then she walked past the kitchen to the laundry room and set the suit jacket into the suit steam cleaner that they owned. She then threw the tee shirt he had been wearing underneath into the washing machine along with a small amount of detergent. She then turned it on and left the room. She walked into the kitchen and noticed her mum still sitting there, reading some newspaper that was on the counter as she sipped her tea.

"Got anymore chamomile tea?" Rose asked. Her mum looked at her and quirked a small smile.

"I'll make you some." She said. She put the kettle on and sat back down across from her daughter.

"Today has been one hell of a day." Jackie said, sipping her tea. "This would be about the time I should be drinking something stronger. We haven't gone to the pub in ages together." She commented smirking a smile after seeing Rose give out a small chuckle.

"How is the Doctor getting used to things?" She asked. Rose relaxed herself back in the chair as she crossed her arms.

"Well, besides me having him wear a pair of Mickey's jim jams, chuck the water temperature for his shower, and put his jacket and shirt in the wash, he's not doing so bad." She said looking away from her mum for a moment. There was silence for a few moments, then the kettle began to whistle. Jackie got up and poured some hot water from the kettle into a mug and then reached into the cupboard for a tea bag. She put it in the steaming mug and set it down in front of Rose. She then sat across from her again, watching her eyes searching outside, looking at the floor, everywhere but looking at her mum in the eye. Rose finally shifted towards her mug and pulled it closer to her, dipping the tea bag up and down into the mug.

"Rose-" Jackie said, getting a look from her daughter.

"Don't go there mum." Rose said. "My mind is a jumbled mess right now."

"As it should be." Jackie said. "A lot of stuff happened today." She said putting a hand across the table and giving Rose's arm a small squeeze. "I never thought I'd say this but I'm glad he's here with you." Jackie watched her daughter give out a heavy sigh, looking back out towards the rain.

"Mum, he's not the real Doctor." Rose said. Jackie gave her daughter a slightly disgruntled look.

"You say that, but you've been smiling off and on today, not to mention holding his hand all the time." She commented. Her daughter didn't say anything, just looked at her with a look of uncertainty.

"Just give it time." Said Jackie. "I know I am really rubbish at giving advice." She said pulling her hand away from her daughter again and crossing her arms.

"Mum don't say that." Rose said, trying to smile for her mum.

"Rose I know I am rubbish with advice. You never listen to anything I tell you to do, especially when it has to do with that man." She said pointing upwards. "Sweetheart, I can already see that the Doctor that's upstairs, that's here right now, cares about you." She said.

"Mum-" She said before Jackie interrupted her.

"I never thought I'd have someone like your father back in my life. I know he's not the bloke I first married, but ever since we got here Rose, more and more I see your real father in his eyes. Being here gave me and Pete a second chance." She watched Rose give her mum a reassuring smile.

"I know that mum." Rose said. Jackie looked at her daughter smirking a small smile.

"I think the Doctor upstairs in our shower is your second chance too Rose." Jackie said. She knew Rose well enough to see the look in her eyes meant she was still unsure.

"I don't-" She said before Jackie put her hands out in front of Rose.

"Just listen to me, for once." Jackie said taking a breath for a moment before she spoke again. "Rose, because of the Doctor we've both seen things and done things we never thought were possible. We may have other versions of us out there muckin' about but this, this here is our only life to live Rose. Just like that man upstairs that's been holding your hand all night. He only has one life and he wants to spend it with you. Don't you think that you should just accept what the Doctor did for you and make this Doctor happy? I'm sure he's happy knowing a version of him never has to be alone."

"I just don't know mum, it's too early. It's hard to believe he's even real. I kept thinkin' if I let go of his hand earlier, he was going to disappear." She said looking at her hand, it was empty now and it felt so fragile without him holding it. "It's hard to think of this being some form of reward, then a sentence." She said.

"I know it's going to be hard but we're all here for you, you know that." Jackie said. "Mickey was probably better at this then me." She said looking away from Rose for a moment.

"That's not true mum." Rose said reassuringly.

"It's true, I hated what you went through because of what had happened. Mickey was there all the time to help you, and now he's gone." Jackie said, trying to fight the sudden tears in her eyes.

"Oh, mum.." Rose got up and walked over to her mum sitting in the chair and hugged her.

"I'm gonna miss him." Jackie said. Rose hugged her mom tight and patted her shoulder.

"I'm gonna miss him too mum but he'll be fine. I'm sure of it. Just like all the others." She stood up, feeling a bit hopeful thinking about Mickey, Jack, Sarah Jane, and Martha. She then thought about the Doctor and Doctor Donna.

"I'm sure the Doctor and Donna are on some other planet by now, getting into god knows what nonsense." Rose said shaking her head and slightly snickering..

"I thought he was taking her home." Jackie said.

"What?" Rose asked.

"The Doctor, I thought he was taking Donna home after he left from the beach." Jackie said, giving out a sigh that she didn't slip when she had thought of saying 'left us on the beach'. Rose stood next to her mom and thought for a few moments then her eyes went wide and she lowered herself where she matched her mum's height while she sat in her chair.

"Mum, what gave you that impression that the Doctor was taking Donna home?" Rose asked Jackie.

"I didn't have an impression about it. I thought that's what the Doctor said." Jackie said looking at Rose and slightly getting worried.

"Which Doctor told you that?" Rose asked.

"The one upstairs." Jackie said. Rose's heart began to crack on the corners she could feel her knees begin to buckle. She was relieved she was already halfway to the floor already.

"What else did he say mum?" Rose asked, almost pleading to her mother for the answers.

"Rose-" Jackie said, trying to change the subject.

"Mum, what did he say?...".


	4. Thrown down, like a barricade

Chapter 4: Thrown down

As he cut the shower off, he remembered to turn the nozzles to turn the water completely off.

"Can't waste water on this planet, now can we?" He said out loud. He then stepped out of the shower onto the small bath rug and opened the linen closet. He pulled out a towel sitting folded on the top of the pile and dried himself off. He had taken showers before but taking a shower now was all the more exhilarating. He picked up the boxers he had worn earlier and cringed then looked down.

"Well, looks like I don't have much of a choice here." He said sliding the boxers back on. He opened one of the cabinets and found a new stick of deodorant, still sealed and never used.

"Well, thank goodness for that." He said picking it up and pulling the clear plastic cover off of the top and opening it. He sniffed it then shrugged and put some on. He then smelled his arm pits one by one.

"Ah! Much better." He said putting the stick of deodorant back into the cabinet. He smelled his skin and smirked a smile at himself. He was tempted to try the men's body soap but didn't want to smell like Mickey and took Rose's instead. Fresh bananas and coconut in a soap was simply a brilliant idea. He didn't understand why those had to be more for women then men. Men liked bananas and coconuts too. He then changed into his jim jams that were sitting on the sink and rubbed the towel on his head to dry some of his hair out. It was sticking out in all directions when the Doctor looked at himself again in the mirror. He looked the same the only real difference was what was inside. He placed his hand to his chest and felt his single heart beating.

"Still not used to that." He said out loud. He then looked at himself seriously in the mirror for a moment, thinking of the words he had kept saying over and over to people. He thought of the time when Rose and he had gone back in time for her to be there for her father, when he died. The couple that had asked him if they could be saved after the chaos that happened after Rose had caused a wound in time.

_I've traveled to all sorts of places, done things you couldn't even imagine. But you two, street corner, two in the morning, getting a taxi home. I've never had a life like that. _

He gave out a small sigh at the thought and ran his hand across his cheeks. He then made a mental note of getting a razor and learn how to shave as well. The planet, circling the sun at sixty-seven thousand miles an hour and the most he had to worry about now was Rose Tyler and a proper shave. It felt odd having the power to feel the Earth moving so fast, like he was before always on the move, always traveling somewhere. Now, he was just here as the seconds and minutes ticked by, on the slow path. He studied his features for a moment then smiled at himself in the mirror.

"You always talked about humans living their life day after day, the one adventure you could never have.." He said looking into the mirror. He was talking to himself, but thought of the other Doctor as he spoke. "I just hope that you're alright knowing that out there, a part of you is on that adventure." He said. He then looked away from the mirror and picked up his suit trousers and hung the towel over the top of the shower. He walked to his room and pulled the TARDIS coral that was still in the confines of his suit trouser pocket and put it in the drawer in the nightstand next to his bed. He then set the pants down over the top of the wooden chair in the corner. He was tired, but he wasn't going to be rude. He decided to find Rose to at least tell her goodnight. He turned around and walked out of the room across the hall to Rose's room. He stood there awkwardly for a moment, wondering if she was even in there. He hadn't heard her enter her room or any noise inside to be able to tell.

"Rose?" He knocked at her door with his knuckle with a quick tap-tap. He tried to hear into the bedroom, placing his ear against the door but he couldn't hear much of anything.

"Rose?" He said again, as he began to open the door to peep inside. He let himself in and lightly shut the door behind him. Rose was standing there at the balcony window looking out towards the rain that was pouring down. It was quiet in her room, just the sound of the rain against the sliding glass window and his own breathing.

"Rose?" He tried again. She whirled around and saw him standing there in Mickey's jim jams. He could see the twinkling in her glassy eyes against the artificial light provided by the street lights.

"oh.. I didn't hear you." She said lightly. He gave her a small smile.

"I just wanted to say goodnight." He said.

"Ah, well, goodnight then." She said turning towards the window again as the rain trickled down.

He turned and walked to the door of her room, the opposite direction that he truly wanted to go. He saw the look in her eyes, she had been upset about something. Even the sound to her voice was lighter and raspy showing she had been upset or was about to be.

"Why-" She said just as the Doctor had placed his hand on the knob of her door. He turned back to look at her.

"What?" He asked as she turned her body to look at him again, he had to catch his breath to take in how she looked in front of him. She was wearing a silk nightgown that hugged at every curve on her body. Her terry cloth robe had covered most of her arms but was hanging off of her shoulders. Her silky blonde hair falling across her shoulders like small strands of sunlight in the darkened room. She was the vision of a heavenly being. He thought of how she looked, surrounded in the bright glow of the time vortex when she had saved him and the world from destruction. He collected himself before asking again.

"What were you going to say?" He asked.

"It's just..." She turned her gaze back out towards the window. "Why didn't you tell me about Donna?" She asked. It caught him by surprise.

"I can tell you about Donna." He said walking back up to her and taking her hands. "Oh, I can tell you loads of stories of Donna!" He smiled tugging her hands. "There was this one time we went to Pompeii, right before the eruption of Vesuvius!" He watched her face not show one glimmer of a smile. The smile he had on his face faded away.

"Wrong story to tell?" He asked. Her eyes looked at him then, glassy and brimming with tears.

"Donna's gone..." She stated. "Mum told me.." She said, looking into his eyes. The Doctor gave out a heavy sigh and released her hands, making them fall to her sides. "He's alone now.."

"Probably." The Doctor answered not looking into her eyes. The pain there was unbearable to look at, especially after she seemed so cheery a little while ago.

"Why didn't you tell me what was going to happen to Donna?" She asked.

"Because..I thou-" He said being cut off.

"Thought what? That I couldn't handle it? I've grown up a little since the last time you saw me. I'm not just some girl meant to work in a shop all her life."

"I didn't mean-" He tried.

"I spent so much time trying to find him, I came so far, just to be sent back here. I never thought in a million years that he'd leave me here, especially, if he knew he was going to be alone after he left." She said.

"Oi! He left me here too." He stated.

"That's because of what you did. He left you in my care." She argued. He started to feel his anger starting to bubble up. How dare she. He felt like someone being put in foster care because he was too much of a handful for his original creators to deal with.

"Which was completely uncalled for! I'm not a child! You know perfectly well that if I hadn't done what I did the entire cosmos would have been in danger!" He said raising his tone a bit. His eyes were almost blazing with his furrowed brow. It was the warning of the oncoming storm.

"It's something he wouldn't have done. He would have given them a choice." She said.  
"He didn't have a choice, he would have done what I did. At that point there was no other option. They would have wiped the human race off of the Earth! And they wouldn't have stopped there.." he said looking into her eyes now. He was angry and it was odd seeing him in this form acting like the former Doctor she remembered. Oh how she missed him, the man with that daft grin and those big ears sometimes. She never wanted to admit it, but even when she had been traveling with the Doctor when he had first regenerated, she missed the old version of him at times. She knew he was still in there somewhere, within the new Doctor. He still held the same memories of them, but so did the one that was standing now before her. She turned away from him and looked outside, feeling a few of her tears trickle down her face. She was a jumble of emotions right now and she just couldn't hold it in anymore. He stood behind her as she looked out of the window.

"Rose, they would've wiped the human race off of the planet and then.." He said looking away from her now, he turned away. He felt the burning in his eyes of oncoming tears. Stupid humans and their mixture of emotions.

"Then..?" She said. He felt her hand on his shoulder. She didn't sound angry anymore, she sounded more like she was worried.

"Then.. they would have started to take everyone away from him, from me." He said giving out a sigh.

"They would have killed us." She stated matter of factly.

"They would've left him and I for last of course, so we could see everyone we ever cared about now, everyone he ever...just like that." He said, shaking his head of the thought of losing all of them, including Rose.

"I couldn't let anything happen to any of them, or to you." He said turning around and looking at her again. "I'd rather it be me to have the genocide on my hands then on his." He said. She looked at him, studying his features. His nose, his dark brown eyes, his hair in all directions, and a bit damp from the shower.

"I'm sorry, I-" She began to say but didn't finish before he put a finger to her lips.

"It's alright." he said looking away from her now and looking out of the window. "I didn't tell you about Donna because of all that's gone on today. I didn't want to cause you anymore sadness. I'm sorry I didn't tell you." He stroked the side of her cheek as a single tear fell across her cheek. "Rose Tyler, from now on I'll be honest. You have my word that I'll tell you if something important goes on, and I will answer any question you ask."

"Any?" She asked him raising an eyebrow. Her lips quirked up in a small smirk and it made the Doctor give out a small sigh of relief.

"Any." He stated. Giving her a slight smile back.

"Why couldn't he say it?" She asked, completely without hesitation. He watched as her sadness returned. Her eyes were threatening to release more tears. _Except that.. _he thought in his head.

"Rose..he does love you." He said. He watched her distance herself from him again. He felt his heart break seeing her upset. He was beginning to have selfish thoughts. That she obviously didn't want him, the one that stood in the same room as her, but it didn't matter right now.

"Then why didn't he say it?" She asked

"Because he knew he couldn't give you what you wanted." His voice was light, but he felt himself getting a bit annoyed. Rose was vulnerable right now, but so was he.

"And what was it that I wanted besides staying with him forever?" She asked, crossing her arms.

"Forever for him is different then yours." He said.  
"So dropping me off back here is better? Out of sight out of mind then?" She asked, her brows furrowed and her hands were clenching into fists now. She was getting angry.

"He didn't drop you off back here alone. He dropped you here, with me." He said, feeling himself starting to get annoyed.

"He dropped you here to for me to keep an eye on you." She said.

"He dropped me here to be with you." He said, trying to correct her.

"Well I don't want you, I want him." She said flatly, making the Doctor wince at her words.

"I am him Rose." He said.

"No you're not." She stated.

"Who am I then?" He asked with his hands out. She looked at him, fully for the first time since they were on the beach. He had no TARDIS, no sonic screwdriver, not even two hearts, but he looked exactly like the Doctor. From his feet to his ridiculously good looking messy hair. A part of the Doctor was standing in front of her. The one that spoke the words she desperately wanted to hear so long ago. The one that was wearing Mickey's Jim jams standing awkwardly fidgeting in her room, waiting for her to reply. He was part human part timelord, far away in another world where not many knew him, and he was vulnerable.

"I- I'm sorry..I shouldn't have said that." She said walking towards him as he dropped his arms to his sides in physical defeat. He'd never had an argument nor a conversation that had felt so draining.

"Rose...it's alright..." He said wrapping his arms completely around her as she got within arms length of him. He didn't have to say what was alright. The lashing out, the anger, the fear, the sadness, the loss. He knew it was a mix of everything, because he in some way or form was feeling the same way she did. They both felt lost.

She buried her face into his chest, feeling more tears begin to come and the sobs began. He held her tighter all the while feeling his own eyes brimming with tears. He gave out a small sniffle and Rose didn't have to look up to know he was beginning to cry too. They both held each other for a while as they mourned their losses of the Doctor, Donna and the world that was left behind.

Rose's sobs finally slowed and stopped and as she rubbed her face against his shirt, she looked up at him. His face had a small stream of tears escaping him. She had seen him a few times upset, but never like this. Never so human. She reached up and brushed a tear from his cheek. He looked down at her, giving out another small sniffle. She let him go reluctantly and walked over to her bedside table and grabbed a few tissues. He followed her and stood next to her bed with her. She handed him a few tissues. He wiped his face with one and then blew his nose, making a loud sound. Rose gave out small giggle with the nasal sound as she wiped her own tears away.

"Oh.. you're shirt.." She said. The front of his shirt was wet from her tears. He gave her a weak smile.

"It's alright, it's just a shirt."He said, pulling it over his head and taking it off. He balled it up in his hands, not knowing what to do with it. She wasn't used to seeing him bare chested. Just on rare occasions when she had been aboard the TARDIS and they had both gone swimming in the swimming pool that was in the library. She sat on the bed and patted the spot beside her. He obediently sat next to her. She leaned her head against his shoulder. No other words were exchanged, just the sound of the rain beating repeatedly against her window. He turned his head and breathed in the fruity smell that came from her hair as he wrapped one arm around her side.

He kissed the top of her head as she lay there against him. She then shifted and moved his arm from her side. She curled up and layed on her bed, her head resting on her pillow. The Doctor got up and she watched him as he stood at her bedside. He leaned in and kissed her head and ran his fingers through her hair for a moment.

"Goodnight Rose." He said. As he turned away from the bed, he felt a hand grab one of his wrists. He stopped in mid stride and turned around. He was looking right into her eyes, they were so beautiful and so unbearably sad at the same time.

"Don't.." She whispered. "Please don't go.." She said, her eyes pleading more then her whispered voice.

He nodded and joined her on the bed. As he rested on her bed, Rose shifted, turned around and faced him as she closed her eyes. She moved one of her hands onto his chest, feeling his heart flutter beneath her touch. He placed his hand on top of her hand that was against his chest, giving out a sigh. This felt so pleasant after the argument that seemed far away now, having Rose in his arms like this.

He kissed her forehead again then kissed her temple. She barely moved, her eyes closed just feeling his heartbeat and him near her. He kissed her cheek and just below her eyes where her tears had streamed down. He could still taste the salt on his lips from her cheek. He kissed her lower jaw and then watched her cautiously. She had her eyes open now, watching him, waiting for his next move. He hesitated, to kiss her again. He was scared of being rejected or pushed away or not wanted. The amount of suffering he had seen on Rose's face through out the day had been enough. He leaned in slowly, praying in his mind that she wouldn't turn away from him. As his lips touched hers, he waited to be pushed away, but he wasn't. Instead he felt her other hand that was not on his chest running through his hair. He let go of her hand that was against his chest and wrapped his arms around her, embracing her tightly against him as he kissed her harder. She finally shifted away for a moment, but then came right back to his lips after a few moments of air.

Her lips crashed against his in constant fever, not wanting to stop. The Doctor felt his heart hammering in his chest like never before. It made him want to hold her tighter and never let her go. As their passionate kisses eased, they just smiled at each other lightly kissing each other back and forth. He watched Rose's eyes become heavy and soon she fell asleep after another sweet kiss upon his lips. He watched her silently in the night for a few moments, never wanting to look at anything but her. He felt himself falling asleep and closed his eyes slowly.

"I love you." He whispered before he gave in to sleeping, hoping the time he was unconscious, he would dream of Rose.

_Thrown down... like a barricade  
Maybe now he could prove to her  
That he could be good for her  
And they should be together  
About just how much he never really told her...  
About how difficult it had been to be without her...  
Thrown down... _


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5:

_All around him were circuits and control panels and Daleks. The Daleks were pouring into the control room, ready to finally end the war by destroying the last living Timelord in existence. There was no way out, all he could do was stand there and accept his fate. He closed his eyes, grateful that Rose was home, safe in the past. There was the unmistakable sound then of the TARDIS. The Doctor's eyes shot open to see what he could not possibly be seeing._

"_WHAT? TARDIS MATERIALIZING!" One of the Daleks said._

"_HE WILL NOT ESCAPE!" The Dalek emperor bellowed with rage. _

_The TARDIS materialized fully and the doors opened, revealing Rose surrounded by the light of the time vortex. The Doctor took a few steps back then fell backward. She was one moment at the doors then a blink later in front of the Doctor. _

"_What have you done!" The Doctor exclaimed._

"_I looked into the TARDIS and the TARDIS looked into me." Rose said. Her voice had merged with the vortex, making it sound like a heavenly angel bringing about the gift of chaos. _

"_You looked into the time vortex, Rose, no one's meant to see that!" The Doctor said, not worrying about the Daleks that surrounded them, but of Rose._

"_THIS IS THE ABOMINATION!" Shrieked the emperor of the Daleks._

"_EXTERMINATE!" A Dalek said, shooting its laser at Rose. _

_Her eyes had become filled with the gold light from the time vortex. Rose instantly raised her hand and not only blocked the laser beam but made the beam go back into the laser and caused it to stop. The Doctor watched her in awe. _

"_I am the bad wolf. I create myself." She said looking at the Doctor, then she turned her attention to the panel above the door where the words BADWOLF corporation was."I take the words, I scatter them, in time and space, a message to lead myself here." She said making the letters swirl all around and making them disappear out of view. The Doctor was normally not scared of a human, but it ran deeper then that, he was scared for her. A human wasn't meant to absorb the time vortex, even his own people couldn't survive it. She had to let go of the power of the time vortex soon or she would be lost forever. _

"_Rose you've got to stop this. You've got to stop this now." He said trying to get her to understand. He didn't want to lose her, he couldn't lose her. "You've got the entire vortex running through your head, you're gonna burn!" He said raising his tone, hoping she would listen. Her eyes turned to him and changed from the golden hue back to her own. _

"_But I want you safe, my doctor..." She said. _

His eyes shot open, seeing a golden light almost blinding him in his eyes. It disoriented him for a moment before he backed up and almost fell off of the bed. He then realized he was wrapped in the covers and the glowing light was the bright light of the sun from the window. He then looked at the bed and realized it was just him in the bed. The room was the same as it had been last night, just empty without Rose.

"Rose!" He exclaimed, jumping out of bed. He ran to the bedroom door and pulled it open, running into the hallway, almost crashing into her.

"Where's the fire?" Rose asked. The Doctor gave a breath of relief. Rose watched him for a moment, possibly trying to make sure this Doctor hadn't gone crazy overnight.

"Sorry, I woke up and you weren't there in the room. I was a bit worried." He said.

"I just went down and got your clothes was all." She said handing them to him. He counted the items and looked at her.

"You washed my pants?" He asked.

"Yeah, I hope you don't mind." She said.

"No! Not at all! You didn't have to go out of your way like that though." He said.

"It's alright. I don't mind." she said. She then watched him bouncing his weight from one foot to the other.

"Are you alright?" She asked curiously.

"Sorry, bathroom." He said bolting past her and into the bathroom, shutting the door behind him. Well she certainly wasn't used to that. She walked up to the bathroom door.

"Doctor? I'm gonna go downstairs and make us some breakfast, just come down when you're ready." She said.

"Okay." She heard him say on the other side of the door. She then went downstairs and walked into the kitchen.

"Is he up now?" Jackie asked as she entered the kitchen.

"Yeah, he's awake. I'm gonna make him a proper breakfast. Let's see.." She said opening the fridge and looking around. She pulled out a few eggs, slices of bread and some butter. Her mother watched her go from one side of the kitchen to the other getting pans out to cook with. She didn't dare stop Rose when she was caught up in something so she just sipped her morning coffee as she eyed her from her spot at the kitchen table. She then looked at her watch.

"Well, I think I'll be off now." Jackie announced.

"Where do you think you're goin'?" Rose asked.

"Just out with Marie. We need to find proper dresses for the Torchwood social." Jackie said. "You should start looking for one yourself." She added.

"I have loads of time." Rose said.

"Two weeks is not loads of time Rose." Her mum said putting her hands on her hips.

"Mum, every year it's taken you about two weeks to make a final decision on what to wear, not me." Rose said.

"You do have a point. I really do get picky at what to wear for these things don't I?" Asked Jackie.

"Well it is a social, everyone is dressed up." said Rose.

"Yeah but you never hear any conversations at the social about anybody spending two weeks figuring out what dress to wear." Jackie noted. She then looked at her watch.

"Ooo! I better leave now or I'll never make it uptown in time. Are you gonna be alright sweetheart?" Jackie asked suddenly while picking up her purse, catching Rose by surprise.

"I'll be fine, I'm taking the Doctor shopping and I think we'll be at my flat tonight." Rose said.

"Should I wait to take you two back to your flat?" Jacke asked. Rose shook her head.

"No mum, go ahead and go. I'll borrow dad's jeep for the night. He rarely ever uses it anyway. Do you think he'll mind?" Asked Rose.

"I doubt he'll mind sweetheart, just go ahead. Besides he trusts you with that bloody thing more then me." She said. Jackie then gave her a tight hug. "Don't hesitate to call me if you have to." She said.

"I'll be fine mum, really." She said. "If I need you, I'll call you on your mobile." She said, giving her a smile.

"Alright. I'll call you after I pick Tony up." Jackie said picking up her purse again and leaving out the door. The house was silent then. Pete was already at Torchwood and Tony was at daycare, her mum was out and Katherine was off for the day. There was no one in the house but her and the Doctor. It felt strange being in this house with it being so empty. She wasn't alone now, not really but she hated the quiet. She decided now would be a good time to start breakfast then any and buttered some slices of toast. She then cut circles out in the middle and laid them inside the pan. She turned the burner on and began to cook the bread slowly. She added an egg into the hole she had made into the bread. She then put some bacon into the skillet next to it and watched it cook. She walked over to the drawers in the middle counter of the kitchen and pulled it open. She sifted through all the different gadgets and then found the spatula that she was looking for. She flipped the pieces of bread over and let them cook evenly on the other side along with checking the bacon that was popping. She backed away for a moment, trying to save her skin from hot oil popping. She then turned the heat off of the burners and took a few plates out. She placed two pieces of toast on each with eggs in the middle of them with a few strips of bacon. She felt a smile coming to her face already hearing the footsteps on the staircase.

"Something smells-" he said going into the kitchen and stopping at the table looking at the plates, he gave her a huge grin. "-fantastic." She smiled at him and handed him a plate.

"I figured you'd like this." Rose said.

"I haven't had this since we were on our way to Adipose three! Well, different eggs and the bread was two times thicker!" He said looking at her, she smirked a shy smile at him as she picked up her plate.

"Ah good old eggy in the basket, also known as eggs in a hole, or eggs in a blanket, or-" He said before Rose put a finger to his lips.

"Doctor?" She said.

"Mm?" He said, watching her.

"Talking about the history of eggy in a basket isn't going to help you eat it before it gets cold."She said, removing her finger from his lips.

"Ah, quite right." He said. The Doctor followed her into the small office area next to the living room.

"Well, I think it's time for the morning report, don't you?" Asked Rose.

"I don't mind watching the news." Said the Doctor.

"Oh, this isn't the news." She said, smiling.

"What is it then?" He asked.

"You'll see." She said.

"Torchwood authorization access code three dash seven nine five." Rose said out loud. The Doctor watched as the wide television screen that was in the office began to boot up by itself.

"Torchwood access initiated. Please state user authorization." The feminine bot voice said.

"Rose Tyler Torchwood Earth Defense." She stated.

"Voice confirmed. Torchwood Earth Defense authorization access granted."

"Call Ianto Jones please." Rose said.

"Calling Ianto Jones." The voice said.

The screen then went from static to a view of an office. A man in a suit came to the screen then.

"Hey Rose!" Said Ianto.

"Hi Ianto! What's the status report for this morning?" She asked.

"Looks like everything is back to normal here. No reports of any activity at all today. And I was getting so excited with the action from yesterday. I feel like I missed out on it all again." He said almost mopey.

"Don't worry Ianto, you didn't miss much." She stated, trying not to make him feel bad.

"Rose, you do realize you are a bad liar, right?" Ianto said. Rose looked at the Doctor for a moment with a piece of bacon in his mouth. He quirked a smirk and nodded his head in confirmation.

"Who's that bloke sitting next to you? Don't tell me.." Ianto said looking into the screen. The Doctor swallowed the chewed bacon he had in his mouth before giving him a smile.

"Hello! I'm the Doctor!" He said.

"Pete told me he was there. I guess that means asking you to the social as my date is out." Ianto said smirking a smile. Rose didn't get to say anything before the Doctor spoke.

"Social?" The Doctor said, turning to Rose.

"Oh, right. It's a party that's held with all the people of the board for Torchwood. Every executive from Torchwood in the neighboring countries come." Rose said.

"Ah! Brilliant!" Said The Doctor. He then looked at Ianto on the screen. "Unfortunately Ianto, I haven't had the chance to ask her yet, so the option is still there. It's just up to her." The Doctor said looking at her and smirking a smile. How could he say that after last night kissing her the way he did, holding her the way he did? If anything, she'd hope he'd plan to go with her to the dance. She felt herself feeling a bit uneasy, but instantly felt his hand on hers. She knew it wasn't because he didn't want to, it was because it was up to her if she really wanted him.

"Sorry, but I know she'll say no with you around Doctor." Ianto said.

"And I thought I'd at least have one challenge." Said the Doctor.

"There's no challenging Rose's determination to get to you sir." Ianto said. "But I'd like to know what all happened Rose. Pete wouldn't tell any of us a thing. He just told me everything was back to normal and we would have a full report from you sometime in the near future." Ianto said.

"Don't worry, I'll fill you lot in. I say we all should meet up, regular place for a pint tomorrow?" Rose said.

"Sounds splendid." Said Ianto.

"Well, we are heading off then. I'll contact you tomorrow." Rose said getting up from the table taking both of their plates.

"Alright Rose, call if you need anything." Ianto said. His eyes giving away that he meant more then just business.

"Alright." She said to Ianto. "Torchwood com shut down." She said aloud walking away from the couch.

"Torchwood net com shutting down." The female bot voice said. The screen then turned off by itself.

"Well, I'd say that was just as interesting as current events on the news. When did you start using that?" He asked.

"About a year or so ago. It's still new but it works really well. It's voice authorized, so it won't work unless it's my voice saying things. When you start working in Torchwood I'll get you access numbers so you can do the same." Rose said. He didn't say a word to her, he just smiled a big smile. _Rose Tyler, defender of the Earth._

"Well, I think I'm going to get ready so we can go." Rose said. "Don't forget anything because we are stopping over at my flat first." She noted.

"Yes Ma'am" He said, running up the stairs


End file.
